Believe in who He has made you to be.

'Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?"'  Matthew 14:31

I rarely doubt Him, or His Goodness, or His plans for my life - the big things.  I rejoice and trust in all of those things knowing that He my best aligned.  I doubt in the little things - mostly I doubt myself.  I wrestling with where He is calling me. I question my own abilities. I challenge who He has made me to be.  I doubt. 

Through a nursing experience where I completely failed - the Lord spoke so loudy to me.  My professor sat me down in a small room, placed her hand on my leg and asked me, 'Traci, why did you doubt yourself?' Boom. Just like that my world started spinning.  I knew in this moment that I had failed terribly, I heard the Lord speak those words so loudy and clearly to me.  Incredible. He has been trying to teach me all year to believe in myself, to be confident, to know that He has placed knowledge in me and to share it. All year there have been little things here and there, people's words, His word, little by little I have been transformed.  He has been teaching me to step up and step out - all the while I still doubt if I am capable.  This time the Lord didn't speak too softly, He screamed.  I needed the Lord to grab my attention - He did.  Message sent and lesson re-learned. I didn't believe in myself.  I knew the right thing.  I hesitated and questioned. I doubted my knowledge.

I am so thankful that He spoke to me in this way.  I am grateful that I failed. I couldn't have orchestrated it better if I had tried.  I needed to fail. I needed to learn.  I needed to hear Him speak to me. I in turn received beautiful affirmation from Him and from those same professors. 

He spoke. He humbled. He comforted. He taught. He provided. He filled. 

He was faithful through it all. 

 

I will fight this battle.  I will believe in myself.  I will learn.  I am choosing daily to trust, to have faith, and to believe in the Christ in me. He has given me so much.  I will be confident in that.

Accept the truth.

A patient of mine made me smile a little bigger today.  With those simple words, he reminded me of the importance of giving a compliment.  I want you to hear the truth dear sister of mine.

You are beautiful.

The way you smile lights up an entire room.

The way you love people makes Him shine ever so brightly.

Your caring heart draws people in.

You are altogether lovely. 

I need Him.

'My soul, wait in silence for God only,

For my hope is from Him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.

On God my salvation and my glory rest;

The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.

Trust in Him at all times O people;

Pour out your heart before Him;

God is a refuge for us.'

Psalm 62:5-8

My hope is in Him.  

He is the anchor of my soul.  

He is my steady.

He is the safe place that I run to.

He knows me and sees me.  

 If He is my Rock and I run to Him for shelter and strength, 

I can overcome anything.  

I can do all things when He is my foundation.  

'Create in me a clean heart O God.

And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Do not cast me away from Your presence.

And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.  

Restore to me the joy of Your salvation.

And sustain me with a willing spirit. 

Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,

And sinners will be converted to You.'

Psalm 51:10-13

We have salvation in Him.  

This is deliverance and freedom from sin.  

REJOICE.  

He does not hold a record of wrongs against us.  

Hold fast to the truth that you are forgiven.  

You are freed from guilt or shame.  

Forgive yourself.

Choose to live in the JOY that only He can give.

You are a beloved child of God, He rejoices over you.  

'When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, 

Your consolations delight my soul.'

Psalm 94:19

His consolations delight my soul. 

Consolation to me means accepting love and comfort.  

When I am anxious, I need Him more than ever. 

 I need to turn to His Word and turn to prayer.  

His love and His comfort are found throughout His Word.  

Verse after verse, page after page - 

I find comfort, grace, love, strength, peace, my everything. 

I want to meditate over His Words.

I need to meditate over His Words.

 I need His truths to be what is filling me.  

Trust.

I need to be reminded to trust and have faith that He is behind all things. 

He sees us, He knows each of us intimately. We are heard by Him, He hears our crys and our prayers.  In fact, they please Him. Rest in that. When we are let down by man, when we are hurting or mourning we must remember that He is with us. We can handle pain and disappointment from man because we have a God who sees us and knows us.  Be patient.  Extend love.  Be merciful.  He has us all in His hands and He will carry us to greener pastures.  Be faithful with Him until you see where He has brought you and what He has brought you through.  He never leaves your side. 

Oh, I am running to your arms,
running to your arms.
The riches of your love will always be enough,
nothing compares to your embrace.

Just like our earthy fathers, our Heavenly Father will pick us up.  He will also set us down.  He will never place us somewhere that we cannot handle.  He is with us and we need Him to make it through the valleys and over the mountains.  As a child we did not always want to be picked up, nor did we want to be set down but each and every time this happened we were never in danger.  Our parents love for us was too great to place us somewhere we shouldn't be or somewhere we could be harmed.  Things with our Daddy are the same.  Just like when we were kids, we did not always understand and would cry or throw a tantrum from time to time.  Things with our Daddy are the same.  What we did not see then, but we can now since we are older is that our parents saw what was best for us.  They carried us to keep us safe, they carried us because at times we could not walk, they carried us so we would not get lost; they carried us because they loved us.  They always made sure we were safe.  This is what our Daddy does for us too.  He carries us through this life in and out of different seasons (always for a specific reason).  Sometimes we cling to Him with a warm embrace and other times we kick and scream the whole journey.  I need to remember to relax, let go, trust Him with the change in my life.  Trust that He has my best interest in mind (which He absolutely does!).  While I can't always see or understand why things happen, I can rest in the fact that He will never give me more than I can handle and He will never place me somewhere that is not safe for me.  In time I will see the reasons why, for now I am ever so thankful to have a Daddy who loves deeply. 

No matter what you walk through,
He will always love you,
Just the way you are!

There is grace for us when we do throw a tantrum.  Our Daddy is so patient with us.  He allows us to throw the fits, to question, to doubt, and He loves us just the same.  He knows that we are human.  He knows we crave and seek the why and when of each season of life.  He knows we do not like change but need it to grow and not become complacent with life.  Sometimes we need to just be, let life happen, allow things to take their course.  For us the job can be simple - trust in Him and have faith that He has it covered.  For those times when your flesh gets the best of you and you doubt, wrestle, grumble, and complain about the journey He has you on - turn to His Word.  Allow Him to penetrate your thoughts with His love and wash you with His peace.  

There is nothing you can do to make Him love you more or less; you are loved by the King just by being you! 

Whatever You're doing inside of me,
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace,
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see,
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly.

Reach for Him.  Cling to Him.  Rely on Him.  We need Him to guide us.  There is no way we can make it through this life with our own strength or by our own direction.  We need Him to lead us and to speak to us.  We need Him to be the author of our lives, He writes the best stories.  We need Him to fill us and pour His love into us.  We need Him.  

I'm reaching for the One who brought me out of death and into lifebut I can't lift my hands high enough.

I need Him to carry me and to place me where He wants me.  I want Him to know my heart intimately and see my desire to follow Him.  I need Him to take away my doubts and fill me with truth.  I want to trust, follow, and obey.  I want to have the faith to wait and see what He is doing.  I know He is near and I am so grateful.   I am learning to trust Him more and more each day.  Trust Him in the big and small things.  I must keep my eyes on Him and cling to Him holding fast to the truths I know.