Believe in who He has made you to be.

'Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him, and said to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?"'  Matthew 14:31

I rarely doubt Him, or His Goodness, or His plans for my life - the big things.  I rejoice and trust in all of those things knowing that He my best aligned.  I doubt in the little things - mostly I doubt myself.  I wrestling with where He is calling me. I question my own abilities. I challenge who He has made me to be.  I doubt. 

Through a nursing experience where I completely failed - the Lord spoke so loudy to me.  My professor sat me down in a small room, placed her hand on my leg and asked me, 'Traci, why did you doubt yourself?' Boom. Just like that my world started spinning.  I knew in this moment that I had failed terribly, I heard the Lord speak those words so loudy and clearly to me.  Incredible. He has been trying to teach me all year to believe in myself, to be confident, to know that He has placed knowledge in me and to share it. All year there have been little things here and there, people's words, His word, little by little I have been transformed.  He has been teaching me to step up and step out - all the while I still doubt if I am capable.  This time the Lord didn't speak too softly, He screamed.  I needed the Lord to grab my attention - He did.  Message sent and lesson re-learned. I didn't believe in myself.  I knew the right thing.  I hesitated and questioned. I doubted my knowledge.

I am so thankful that He spoke to me in this way.  I am grateful that I failed. I couldn't have orchestrated it better if I had tried.  I needed to fail. I needed to learn.  I needed to hear Him speak to me. I in turn received beautiful affirmation from Him and from those same professors. 

He spoke. He humbled. He comforted. He taught. He provided. He filled. 

He was faithful through it all. 

 

I will fight this battle.  I will believe in myself.  I will learn.  I am choosing daily to trust, to have faith, and to believe in the Christ in me. He has given me so much.  I will be confident in that.

Accept the truth.

A patient of mine made me smile a little bigger today.  With those simple words, he reminded me of the importance of giving a compliment.  I want you to hear the truth dear sister of mine.

You are beautiful.

The way you smile lights up an entire room.

The way you love people makes Him shine ever so brightly.

Your caring heart draws people in.

You are altogether lovely. 

I need Him.

'My soul, wait in silence for God only,

For my hope is from Him.

He only is my rock and my salvation,

My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.

On God my salvation and my glory rest;

The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.

Trust in Him at all times O people;

Pour out your heart before Him;

God is a refuge for us.'

Psalm 62:5-8

My hope is in Him.  

He is the anchor of my soul.  

He is my steady.

He is the safe place that I run to.

He knows me and sees me.  

 If He is my Rock and I run to Him for shelter and strength, 

I can overcome anything.  

I can do all things when He is my foundation.  

'Create in me a clean heart O God.

And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Do not cast me away from Your presence.

And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.  

Restore to me the joy of Your salvation.

And sustain me with a willing spirit. 

Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,

And sinners will be converted to You.'

Psalm 51:10-13

We have salvation in Him.  

This is deliverance and freedom from sin.  

REJOICE.  

He does not hold a record of wrongs against us.  

Hold fast to the truth that you are forgiven.  

You are freed from guilt or shame.  

Forgive yourself.

Choose to live in the JOY that only He can give.

You are a beloved child of God, He rejoices over you.  

'When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, 

Your consolations delight my soul.'

Psalm 94:19

His consolations delight my soul. 

Consolation to me means accepting love and comfort.  

When I am anxious, I need Him more than ever. 

 I need to turn to His Word and turn to prayer.  

His love and His comfort are found throughout His Word.  

Verse after verse, page after page - 

I find comfort, grace, love, strength, peace, my everything. 

I want to meditate over His Words.

I need to meditate over His Words.

 I need His truths to be what is filling me.  

Trust.

I need to be reminded to trust and have faith that He is behind all things. 

He sees us, He knows each of us intimately. We are heard by Him, He hears our crys and our prayers.  In fact, they please Him. Rest in that. When we are let down by man, when we are hurting or mourning we must remember that He is with us. We can handle pain and disappointment from man because we have a God who sees us and knows us.  Be patient.  Extend love.  Be merciful.  He has us all in His hands and He will carry us to greener pastures.  Be faithful with Him until you see where He has brought you and what He has brought you through.  He never leaves your side. 

Oh, I am running to your arms,
running to your arms.
The riches of your love will always be enough,
nothing compares to your embrace.

Just like our earthy fathers, our Heavenly Father will pick us up.  He will also set us down.  He will never place us somewhere that we cannot handle.  He is with us and we need Him to make it through the valleys and over the mountains.  As a child we did not always want to be picked up, nor did we want to be set down but each and every time this happened we were never in danger.  Our parents love for us was too great to place us somewhere we shouldn't be or somewhere we could be harmed.  Things with our Daddy are the same.  Just like when we were kids, we did not always understand and would cry or throw a tantrum from time to time.  Things with our Daddy are the same.  What we did not see then, but we can now since we are older is that our parents saw what was best for us.  They carried us to keep us safe, they carried us because at times we could not walk, they carried us so we would not get lost; they carried us because they loved us.  They always made sure we were safe.  This is what our Daddy does for us too.  He carries us through this life in and out of different seasons (always for a specific reason).  Sometimes we cling to Him with a warm embrace and other times we kick and scream the whole journey.  I need to remember to relax, let go, trust Him with the change in my life.  Trust that He has my best interest in mind (which He absolutely does!).  While I can't always see or understand why things happen, I can rest in the fact that He will never give me more than I can handle and He will never place me somewhere that is not safe for me.  In time I will see the reasons why, for now I am ever so thankful to have a Daddy who loves deeply. 

No matter what you walk through,
He will always love you,
Just the way you are!

There is grace for us when we do throw a tantrum.  Our Daddy is so patient with us.  He allows us to throw the fits, to question, to doubt, and He loves us just the same.  He knows that we are human.  He knows we crave and seek the why and when of each season of life.  He knows we do not like change but need it to grow and not become complacent with life.  Sometimes we need to just be, let life happen, allow things to take their course.  For us the job can be simple - trust in Him and have faith that He has it covered.  For those times when your flesh gets the best of you and you doubt, wrestle, grumble, and complain about the journey He has you on - turn to His Word.  Allow Him to penetrate your thoughts with His love and wash you with His peace.  

There is nothing you can do to make Him love you more or less; you are loved by the King just by being you! 

Whatever You're doing inside of me,
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace,
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see,
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly.

Reach for Him.  Cling to Him.  Rely on Him.  We need Him to guide us.  There is no way we can make it through this life with our own strength or by our own direction.  We need Him to lead us and to speak to us.  We need Him to be the author of our lives, He writes the best stories.  We need Him to fill us and pour His love into us.  We need Him.  

I'm reaching for the One who brought me out of death and into lifebut I can't lift my hands high enough.

I need Him to carry me and to place me where He wants me.  I want Him to know my heart intimately and see my desire to follow Him.  I need Him to take away my doubts and fill me with truth.  I want to trust, follow, and obey.  I want to have the faith to wait and see what He is doing.  I know He is near and I am so grateful.   I am learning to trust Him more and more each day.  Trust Him in the big and small things.  I must keep my eyes on Him and cling to Him holding fast to the truths I know.  

Smile.

Today has been one of those days where each individual thing has been good, but overall everything has been in a haze.  Just going through the motions of life without any deep emotions.  When I am stuck in that haze, I don't feel real or alive.

One thing today changed my whole day around.  One was a smile from a patient.  An elderly woman, confused beyond belief, in excruciating pain, just moaning and groaning unable to form words - she pulled me out of that haze and gave me life again.  She changed my day.  She suddenly stopped wrestling, stopped groaning, she looked me straight in the eyes and smiled wide from ear to ear.  Her face drew me in.  It allowed me to see her beauty, it allowed me to see her as the mother and grandmother that she is.  She is loved and cherished by her family.  Her smile brightened my day and allowed me to feel alive today.

I hopped in my car after my time at the hospital today.  Matthew West's - Give this Christmas Away was playing.  As I listened to the lyrics I saw more than just a Christmas song.  It brought me back to that woman and her smiling face.  She had the power to give me hope, she made a difference for me today.  Listening to this song all I could do was smile and understand the true beauty that lies in a smiling face.

What if I told you 

You have the power 

To give someone hope 

Beyond their wildest dreams 

What if I told you 

It's right there in your hands 

In your hands  SMILE

It's hard to imagine 

How something so small 

Can make all the difference 

Tear down the tallest wall 

What if December  life

Looked different this year 

What if we all just 

Give this Christmas SMILE away 

If there's love in your heart 

Don't let it stay there 

Give this Christmas SMILE away 

And your life will be changed 

By the gifts you receive 

When you give this Christmas SMILE away 

It's feeding the hungry 

Serving the poor 

It's telling the orphan 

You're not forgotten anymore 

It's doing what love does 

Even when no one's watching you 

Give this Christmas SMILE away 

If there's love in your heart 

Don't let it stay there 

Give this Christmas SMILE away 

And your life will be changed 

By the gifts you receive 

When you give this Christmas SMILE away 

For God so loved the world 

That He gave His only Son 

So we could be 

His hands, His feet, His love 

His love 

What if I told you 

You have the power 

To give someone hope 

Far beyond their wildest dreams 

What if December life

Looked different this year 

Yah what if we all just 

Give this Christmas SMILE away 

If there's love in your heart 

Don't let it stay there 

Please be the one to bring hope, extend love, and really be His hands and feet.  You have the power to be His love, all it takes is a simple smile on your beautiful face.  

You are truly beautiful! You bring light to the darkest of places.  You also bring light to the brightest of places.  Your joy and your tender heart lighten my life.  You encourage me to keep walking.  You spur me on to challenge myself to love deeper.  You are lovely. You are a reason to smile. 

Knock.

 

I want to go to Africa again.  I want to use the knowledge and gifts that He has given me.  I want to use the passions that He has placed in me.  Mostly I want to be used by Him.  The Lord places ideas in our minds and upon our hearts.  He uses His body, creation, and Word to speak to us.  This is compelling.  Act.  Have no fear, He placed passions and ideas in you.  He has given you specific joys and specific talents, use them. Go into the world and be who He has created you to be.  He will continue to fill you and continue to bless you.  You are young. You are able.  Now is the time, go. 

'For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.' 

Philippians 1:6 

He is faithful.  He is just.  He is true to His Word.  He is wonderful to His children. He blesses us in the most beautiful ways. 

'Faithful is He who calls you, and He also will bring it to pass.' 

1 Thessalonians 5:24

Is there something that excites you?  Is there a dream you have that comes with a list of reasons you cannot complete it?  Is there something in your mind that would be incredible if it actually happened?  Make it happen.  Be proactive; ask, seek, and knock! 

He calls us and He will make it happen in His wonderful and beautiful timing.  Do not miss your call.  Do not ignore those tugs on your heart. Listen and act.  Take a risk.  Be changed by Him. 

Word.

'To this end also we pray for you always, that our God will count you worthy of your calling, and fulfill every desire for goodness and the work of faith with power, so that the name of our Lord Jesus will be glorified in you, and you in Him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.'  2 Thessalonians 1: 11-12

I am now a blogger.

Hey there friend.  

There are many things I am, as well as many that I am not.  This year I am learning to take risks, jump out, step in faith (which can be very hard for a person like me).  I am transforming more and more into who He made me to be.  I learning to believe in myself how He believes in me. 

Go and do it. 

I have always wanted to be a runner.  I have never been a runner.  I am a person who goes on runs, and I enjoy it.  This year I decided to become a runner.  I signed up for a half marathon and I started training.  While the race is still two weeks away, I am now a runner.  Redefined. 

Each stride is one step closer to becoming a runner. 

I have always wanted to be a writer.  I have never been a writer.  I was the student in high school whose teachers wrote, 'Come see me,' on papers.  This year I have been writing more.  I journal out my thoughts and prayers regularly.  I send long emails to friends explaining what He is teaching me.  I have first hand witnessed how healthy and fruitful writing is.  While this is only the first post, I am now a writer.  Redefined. 

She believed in herself, and changed her reality. 

I have always wanted to be known and be called beautiful.  I have never felt truly known or that kind of beautiful.  I have been the quiet and reserved girl.  The one that rarely wears make up and fashion...what's that? This year I have learned that I am known by the King of the Ages.  That I am truly beautiful, I am a daughter of the King made in His image.  He has given me a confidence to be myself.  I am more beautiful and less reserved each and everyday.  I accept and believe that He made me beautiful.  I am known and I am beautiful.  Redefined.

Her name is Blessing. She is beautiful and known. 

What is it that you have always wanted to be? Believe in yourself.  Believe in the one who lives in you.  He is powerful and mighty.  His Spirit lives in you, you are capable of all things through Him.  He knows your heart, He knows what it is you have always wanted to do.  Allow Him to help you achieve it.  Surrender your fears and insecurities.  Our God believes in you, I believe in you, what is stopping you from redefining yourself? Believe in yourself. 

You are capable of anything. Be confident in that.